Thursday, May 15, 2003
today was quite a good day.
hahaha guess what teeng
i topped my class for physics! hahahaah. uhhhhhh the CA? hmm.
and then i had nice carbonara pasta for lunnnnnnnch yum!
yea. hahahaah and guess what FISHERMAN IS THE CHAIRMAN OF HIS DUNNO WAD DEFENCE SCIENCE CLUB! MY GOD HAHAHAHA i was damm damn amused. yay good for him he's so uh charismatic and uh yes everything hahahahahaaha :)
wa lau it's been a good day for the both of us. i think we're gonna celebrate!! go somewhere nice to have a GOOD MEAL soon. yep.
posted by :. heroyin. 6:00 AM
WOOHOOOOOOOOO like hi it's 0016 hrs right now and i'm DAMN TIRED hahahaah
hahahahahahahaahaa
i actually did my math portfolio! 5 reflections. finished them all today. actuallly i didn't know i had to do 5 so i did 3.
and then i found out at 1020 that i had to do 5 and so i rushed out 2 more in 40 minutes!! :)
AND THEN i found out my printer wasn't working and so i had to get my classmate to print it for me
what the hell man hahaahhaah
ahhaah but it's ok it's all settled now
rah
i'm getting short sighted. i need specs. i'm quite sure of it. freak man FREAK IT ALEKJF;WAJFW;AOIVHWA;OIVAHW;TOIEWHVA
DVKAJ;VWIEJV;AWOIJWA;OVIJA
ESAIJEWA;AOIJ[3WAIT HP32ATH08VH A3;POIA3HT;AOIHT
f u c k!
ahahahahaahahha sigh
>_<
damn tired damn tired
thank god it's friday tomorrow and not monday.
friday!! :) it's so nice. :)
yea baby only 4 lessons tomorrow. :) -eyelids can hardly stay up-
yawn yawn yawn I LIKE THE MASK!! AHHAHAHA the advertisement is damn funny
"kiss me baby kisss meeeee.."
and then he gets kicked in the crotch
AND THEN
HE SAYS
"ooh she is so COY" in this GAY GAY VOICE HAHAHAHAHA hahahahaha!!!
cameron diaaaaaaaaaaaaaz is eyee candy!! yay hahahahaha go baby GO BABY GO!!!!!!!!
mmuakkkkkkkkkkkk i miss somebody!!!!!!!! <-- duh who else
i miss the sound of him playing the piano for me!! hahahahahaa hahahaahaa sigh
//i know i can be what i wanna be
if i work hard at it i'll be where i wanna be//
yes ok. let's go. we can do it. i know i can!!! be what i wanna be!!!!!!
what the fuck do i want to be?!?! oh shit i don't know
whatever.
o
i've gone mad!!!!! MADDDDDDDD HAHAHAHAHAHAHA like crazy maddddddd like insane maaaaaaaad i like it delirious delicious hahahahahahaaa whocares so anyway i know i can be what i wanna be if i work hard at it i'll be where i wanna be. so just how hard do i have to work. it's hard to work without an aim. it's like..... working without a purpose. there's no immediate result that you would see. you won't see yourself reaching your destination because there IS NO DESTINATION. however you'll see yourself moving forward. but is forward even the right direction?! it's like..... a car on a dark dark road. all you see in front is where yur headlights shine. that little patch of road ahead and you don't really know where it leads to but you know it goes on and you just follow it. scared. the worst part is you don't even know if you've reached a fork in the road or a junction. so even when there's other paths to take eg paths of exit, yu can't even see them.so many of them. sigh so sad. blind! blindddddd. short sighted. hahahahaa omg it all links up!!
ok let's talk about other things.
i love burberry!! :) time flies. like really. it's mid MAY btw. hahahaaa. oh man *_*
argh i'm tired..... i shud sleep soon. sigh..... yea about the stuff about giving people what they want instead of what i really want to, i dunno la. it's horrible. i feel horrible after i do it. like after i did my math reflections. i shud stop it. ok i'm going to consciously stop it. if not i'm just going to become
become some some. stupid. person. argh.
there's something about not being true to yourself. you kind of die inside. mmmmm btw dinner was supeeeeerb
i ate like 2 bowls of rice. there was unagi!! my favourite :)
//but everyday it all just feels the same.....
never never wanna be like you.
i don't wanna do the things you do
i don't ever wanna don't ever wanna be just like you//
sounds good. am listening to p10 right now :) yep bye
posted by :. heroyin. 9:39 AM
Tuesday, May 13, 2003
hope to see you soon too ting.
haaaahaa yesterday was a damn good day!! :))))) damn it. :)
so anyway
gonna watch american idooool sooooooooooooOon
hahahahaa. i'm getting scared of myself.
was doing my math reflections for portfolio.
realised that im starting to give people just what they want instead of what i want to give them.
uh that's mainly for school and teachers.
what's happening to me. whatever. i hope this doesn't spill over to like my normal life. hahahahahaa
laalaaaaa!! see ya sooon teeng MUUUUUUUAAAACKS -hugs-
posted by :. heroyin. 4:23 AM
don't wake me.
i'd rather stay in my crystal clear dreams
because too much of the real thing
will leave me weathered and scarred.
it will cloud my eyes. dull the colour and shine.
and finally leave me blind!
no, not blind. disillusioned.
then, i would rather someone dig my eyes out and leave me blind.
for i would rather not see
than see it not as it is.
posted by :. heroyin. 8:08 AM
hello ting!! hahahaha i'm feeling GAY so i'm using puuuRRRRple.
purrrrR. hahahaha.
caught in the rat race
i'm scared one day i'm going to become like all those people who put up brick walls. caging themselves in as if it makes them any safer. they'll soon suffocate in the darkness.
i think it won't happen. because there's _______ !
:) :) sunshine. :)
whenever _______ is around, i can breathe again.
oXyGeN. haha. HAAAAAAHAAAAAAA ALT CAPS ARE REALLY GAY HAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHHAAH.
:) there's always you to live for.
posted by :. heroyin. 4:00 AM
Monday, May 12, 2003
hello
hello!!!!!!!!!!!!! -tries to sound more enthusiastic-
hello. so, how's the day.
i think i talk to myself in my head so much i don't really blog out what i think. haahhaha
i wonder if i'm ready for the "new" world people wearing even thicker facades. and etc. etc. etc. i cannot be bothered to elaborate.
on a more optimistic note i did my feesiks assignment today. and well kind of understand chem better now.
am going to study at 7. feel like i owe it to someone. wait a minute. i think it's myself.
i used to believe that i should work hard so that i can do well and give myself the widest amount of choices possible for jc. i think i was deceiving myself.
but now i know if i do work hard, it's because i don't have a choice.
if i choose not to work hard, it's so that it leaves me with no choice but to look at other choices.
if i just don't work hard because of whatever reason, it's because i don't care anymore.
we'll see what happens.
posted by :. heroyin. 3:53 AM
Sunday, May 11, 2003
hi i just had dinner... really good. sister bought alot of nice food.
was a kind of post-celebration for mother's day.
i think i'm drunk. my finger's aren't moving as fast as i want them to.
i've been thinking recently
i'm ambivalent about going to jc.
argh. i'm scared of it.
heh
juncollephobia! haahhahaha laaaame shit
haahaha YOU'RE IN LOVE!! REALLYYYYY WITH WHO?? -wink wink-
yes my fingers are moving really slowly i wonder what's wrong.......
i love love love my baby i mean burberry! hahahaahhaaa
hahahaa oh shit sigh
i wonder if i can think straight. there's still dessert later!! some niceeeeeee cakeeeeeeeeee :)
sigh
today was a really long day...
yep training. so long ago. sigh
first we had first block recess and that was ........ sigh. i ate alot as usual like 2 plates of rice and a nice drink
and then
the rest of the day was really damn long. felt really really long although there were only 5 blocks today..
i dun feel like going to school tomorrow!! sigh. i am tired. tired. but there's a holiday on thurs already!! better not slack too much.
my form teacher has decided to set aside a little corner on our whiteboard to the countdown to our prelims. today=[114 days]
and so it'll go down down down......... 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1. boom.
before i know it i'll be fucking sucked into jc. hahahaha. sigh.
i realised today that well
we better face it. not everyone's going to fucking rj.
i was thinking... in my class. who's gonna be in and who's gonna be out? and i realise i have no damn idea.
first i think that well it'll be nice if everyone went to rj. really nice. yay.
then i'll contradict myself by thinking that
well if everyone went to rj wouldn't it be exactly like rg and all the people i know will be THE SAME OLD PEOPLE. varietieeeeeee people we neeeed varietieeeeeeee.
well statistically i know that
it's not possible for all of us to go to rj.
so? so that's that. that's life.
i've been talking to my parents lately. and my brother. and i realise that i don't have much of a choice. it's just rj. yep. basically it.
then they go on and on about ok i just need to try my best blah blah
and if i dun get into rj I KNOW that they'll just blame me why am i so lazy blah blah i shud have tried harder why did i play play play blah blah blah.
i'm tired. really tired.
adapt. we shall all adapt.
posted by :. heroyin. 7:05 AM
it's easier to run
replacing this pain with something numb.
hiiii!!!!!!!! i'm here again!!!!!! after a few minutes of daydreaming!!!!!!
hahahahahahahaha hahahaha.
like moving pictures in my head for years and years they play.
omg when i tried to type like just now i typed love instead. what the hell hahahahahaha
hahahahaahaha. woohoo!! the darkness of my past!
blah blah linkin park blah blah blah
pain anger change regret shame blame denial escapism hate sacrifice numbing cold dark wrong bad suck suck suck life sucks <-- main themes of linkin park songs.
hahahaahhaa. sheesh.
angry and sad people like to listen to such songs. however, rarely, there are happy people who like to listen to these songs too! hahahahaa.
ooooh brings out the... FIRE in them. hahahaha. or for whatever shit reasons they wanna listen to linkin park songs i don't care.
uhu: glue
pentacon: clock
nokia: hp
sony: cd rws
dell: comp
bai jia li: preserved quality fruits
sleep inn: old hotel slot card
brand consciousness? ooooh
AHAHAHAHAHAHA hahahahahaa AM I FUNNY OR FUNNY hahahahahahaha
ok. i'm funny.
posted by :. heroyin. 8:37 AM
hi. i'm gonna sleep soon. i've not even been awake for half a day.
let's see. i woke up at 1. and now it's only 11. ahahahahaha shit man
pig.
burrrrrrp just drank fruit juice! yum
mother's day. happy mother's day :)
bittersweet memories.
shit today was totally unproductive.
uh i kind of filed my.. worksheets. and so on. and so forth.
but somehow everything still looks like a mess.
haven't done any work. that's if there's any. clueless.
love is colossal baby. hahahahaa.
quiet nights of quiet stars
quiet chords from my guitar
floating under silence that surrounds us
quiet thoughts and quiet dreams
quiet thoughts in quiet streams
and a window that looks out
oh how lovely
lamenting gets yu nowhere.
reasons are now inconsequential.
a deluge of emotions!! <--hormones
burberry=baby!! :) <--perfume
/what makes yu tick?
posted by :. heroyin. 8:23 AM
she sits amongst her friends
amidst the bantering and chattering
barely listening on
and she realises
she's really alone.
posted by :. heroyin. 2:19 AM
baby won't yu tell me why there is sadness in yur eyes.
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